Getting Married? Here’s What to Discuss First

Getting Married? Here’s What to Discuss First

Engaged Couple TipsIf you’ve recently gotten engaged, you probably have a lot of different things on your mind. From picking out a wedding venue to deciding on a seating chart, you have a lot of decisions ahead of you.

Before you start wedding planning, there are several topics that you should discuss with your spouse to ensure you’re on the same page moving forward.

But, before the ceremony officially begins, there are a few things that you and your soon-to-be husband or wife should discuss.

Finances

Discussing finances can be difficult, but it’s vital that you do so with your spouse. Whether you plan to combine your finances or keep them separate, you have to be honest where each of you are financially. You need to be open about salary, debt, credit score, and so forth so you can plan for how you’ll afford a wedding and a life together. Once you start crunching some numbers, you can decide how you can make student loan payments, pay down credit cards, budget for groceries, and so forth.

How much money do you plan to spend on a house? How can you start saving for retirement? Are you starting a college fund started for your future children? Discussing finances with your fiancé right from the start will help create an open and honest relationship from the very beginning.

Children

Starting a family is something that many people desire, but it’s important that you and your future spouse desire the same thing when it comes to having children. It is vital that you discuss whether or not you want to have children. If so, it is also important to discuss how many children you want to have as well as when you want to start having children.

Being open about your aspirations to be parents (or not) is important at this phase of your relationship; you don’t want to fast forward a few years from now to learn that your spouse isn’t interested in raising children with you if it’s one of your dreams for your marriage.

Location

One thing that you’ll have to discuss before getting married is where you planning on living when you do. When you’re married, you’ll have to settle down somewhere together but it is important that you agree on that location well ahead of time. You’ll also need to discuss if you’re willing to move in the event that one of you gets a job offer worth relocating for.

Many couples also consider the location of their parents, grandparents, or extended family when deciding where to settle down. If your families are located in different places, consider settling somewhere in the middle.

Looking for a rabbi to make your wedding day special? Contact Rabbi Richard Polirer for a wedding ceremony you’ll always remember.

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